The Second Five of Twenty-five

I meant to finish these up in rapid order but I must apologize, I got sucked down the Kindle Unlimited vortex. It might have been 5 book in as little as 3 days. Oh well, what’s a girl to do?

Sabotage – The Beastie Boys

This song, at least for me, is an era defining song, a middle-finger deliverance to authority that many of us in Generation X felt. The video was nothing sort of brilliant and deserved the constant play it got on Mtv. Of course the actual inspiration of the song has nothing to do with the video. In my research it was written about a sound engineer they were annoyed with, which in a way, still seems to be an anti-authority message.

While i wasn’t exactly out there screaming at cops or getting in arguments with my parents or punching teachers, I don’t like to be told what to do. Pig-headedly I’ll often do the exact opposite of what I’m told or what I know I should do.

Thunder Kiss ’65 – White Zombie

I have no clue what this song is about. I’m not convinced it’s really about anything at all. I can only guess the ’65 is for the year 1965, the year Rob Zombie was born. Other than that it seems like the lyrics are just a bunch of fun but very disconnected phrases that Rob Zombie strung together. I don’t care one bit though. This song has always rocked and Rob Zombie is a freakin’ genius.

If I had another life to live, I’d give it over to music. I’ve always somewhat secretly wanted to learn the bass, play like Sean Yseult and travel the world. I don’t think I ever stop desiring that but I know that’s was never going to happen considering my lack of talent.

Fairweather Friend – To Have Heroes

I first hear this song when the band Midwest Kings opened for Caroline’s Spine in the early 2000’s. MWK hailed from Tulsa, like Spine. At the time a few of the members were still in high school, which given the sophistication of their music floored me. Years later, after member David Cook, appeared and won on American idol, lead singer Andy Skib began working on a new project, To Have Heroes. On the two albums he collaborated with many musician friends. All of the songs were new collaborations except Fairweather Friend. He however rewrote the some of the lyrics.

I think this both versions of this song are about the end of a friendship. The song does not take an angry approach, but rather sad and thoughtful. There are times when I’ve felt like a crappy friend, the fairweather friend. Sometimes I’ve had to pull away for my own sanity and sometimes I was just a big dummy. But like with this song, I am grateful for the time I friendship we shared, even if it was flawed, uneven and ragged.

Hurry Up And Wait – Stereophonics

I don’t know much about the Stereophonics other than they are a UK based band and that the lead singer has a whiskey colored voice that makes me melt. For me, the message of this song is that one must simply find satisfaction in life’s journey. Enjoy the little things in life, not just waiting for the big “important” moments in life to come along.

I Am The Highway – Audioslave

Lyrically I think this might be one of Chris Cornell’s greatest lyrics and that’s saying a lot. The slow mellowness of the song fits the lyrics and even without the words I feel like you could know what this song is about. It has a feeling of being overlooked or mistreated by the people you care about; your friends, your family or significant other. It’s a feeling that the person(s) means much more to you than you do to them.

Pearls of swine bereft of me
Long and weary my road has been
I was lost in the cities
Alone in the hills
No sorrow or pity for the leaving I feel

I am not your rolling wheels
I am the highway
I am not your carpet ride
I am the sky

Friends and liars don’t wait for me
I’ll get on all by myself
I put millions of miles
Under my heels
And still too close to you
I feel

As for how this song relates to me and my life I sometimes feel this way when I’m down or I’ve gotten into an argument with a friend, but often there is one person who comes to mind when I hear this song. It was long ago and I’ve mostly left the whole yucky mess behind me there’s no denying that what happened and how it made me feel about myself colored much of my life afterwards.

Influential Album Challenge Day 8 – Chris Cornell I Am The Highway

Alright, so this is a compilation CD and maybe it’s cheating. But you know what? It’s my list, so there!. At this point, it’s no mystery that the music of Chris Cornell in whatever project he was working on has had a major influence throughout my life. Understandingly, it would just bee to hard for me to pick one or two of his projects and call it good. I figure with this selection of I Am The Highway I can cover everything from Soundgarden, Temple of the Dog, Audioslave and all the great solo works he did.

I became aware of Soundgarden way back in high school. Thanks to the necessary evil MTV and Headbanger’s Ball, this girl from rural Minnesota got to see the videos for Hands All Over and Loud Love. One of the things that impressed me was the voice. How Chris’ voice and Kim’s guitar melded into one other in the opening of Loud Love still impresses me these 30 years later. I purchased Louder Than Love on cassette. When I went away to college and seemed to spend an eternity in the painting studio, this cassette along with Ultramega OK, Flower, Screaming Life/Fopp (which I purchased at a record store/head shop) became my playlist to paint too. (Sidenote: Danzig and German Death Metal that I couldn’t understand a word also were heavily mixed in with Soundgarden). Badmotorfinger was out by this time, but for some reason unknown it didn’t make the cut. Many of my early paintings were created to this odd ball soundtrack I created.

Soundgarden kept me company through the rest of my college career. Badmotorfinger was the soundtrack to my last years at Winona and was the era where I did see Soundgarden live. Superunknown came out during my second stint at college and during one of the best times of my life. My favorite tracks off that CD would have to be My Wave, Fell on Black Days and Just like Suicide. It’s one of those rare CDs that I can listen to from start to end without having the urge to skip songs. I think Chris Cornell was at his best lyrically (for Soundgarden, at least) on this album, though Badmotorfinger is damn close. Down the Upside was also a great album, one I listened to on many roadtrips. I don’t know King Animal very well as I had a young child at the time and time was lacking.

Temple of the Dog was released not too long after Badmotorfinger and that was one cassette I wore out. It was a very different from what I was used to hearing from Soundgarden, but no less impressive. Famously the album was written by Chris Cornell for his friend and roommate, Andy Wood, who had tragically passed away from an overdose. He and members of Pearl Jam recored the album. The lyrics are really personal and in all honesty, as a 21 year old who had never felt loss that deeply, I really didn’t connect with the lyrics until later when I lost some who where close to me. Sadly, I Am The Highway only has 3 songs from Temple of the Dog. There isn’t a song I dislike from this album.

I Am The Highway also has the great Audioslave songs. For me Audioslave was what I listened to when I roadtripped to various shows. It seems fitting to me for some reason.

I think the highlight to I Am The Highway is Chris’ solo career. He could write and play how he wanted without trying to make a Soundgarden or Audioslave sounding song. Chris’ solo career was varied. He dabbled in Pop music (with Timberland), did some sublime covers (Billy Jean, anyone?), soundtrack work for movies like James Bond along with four solid solo albums. Included in this compilation are many songs recorded live as well as 11 previously unreleased songs, the highlight for me being When Bad Does Good. This was released posthumously, and the accompanying video is haunting and so sad. It features Chris’ own son, playing his father as a child. In the video he is delivering newspapers to sights around Seattle that Chris had frequented in his life there. Meanwhile, Chris’ most memorable lyrics are superimposed across the landscape. Heartbreaking.

Other musicians and idols that I have looked up to have passed away, yet not one has affected me quite as much as his passing has. I didn’t know him and yet I miss him.

No One Sings Like You Anymore

[Note: Originally posted on December 2, 2018 on Facebook]

I’ve been sitting on this for a few weeks now and I think it’s finished. It is a deeply personal painting for me, at least the journey in creating it was. This is my little tribute to Chris Cornell. It’s hard for me to explain how important a musician I’d never met was to me (staring contests don’t count, right?) From the first time I saw the video Hands All Over on Headbanger’s Ball in Cathy’s parent’s basement Chris Cornell and his various projects (Audioslave, Soundgarden, soundtracks and his solo career) have made an enormous impact on my life. He was an absolutely brilliant lyricist and made music that was profound that spoke to me and many others. (Do yourself a favor and listen to Just Like Suicide and dig up the story behind it). Yes, he was The Voice of a Generation, a leader of the Grunge Movement out of Seattle, but for those of us who’ve followed his career know just what a versatile artist he was.

And oh, the memories. I can hear a certain song and it brings back friends long gone, or just a moment of my life. His music has even helped me through some tough times in my life. Chris was a captivating frontman as well. I only got to see Soundgarden once, but that show still beats out almost all other bands I’ve seen.

I woke up early on May 18th to my friend Shelly’s text about his passing. It was a gut punch that I just couldn’t deal with at the time. (Some of you know that we’ve been going through some very difficult times, and continue to cope with. I will tell you I was in a pretty dark place last Spring). I was crying and breaking down over, well, everything. I’m sure if I even heard Big Dumb Sex I’d be sobbing.

It’s taken me awhile, but earlier this fall at a workday at school I decided that I actually wanted to listen to some Soundgarden. I put on this mix on YouTube and proceeded to clean out all those old books and magazines left in my art room from the previous teacher. I was actually bopping around, singing and overall enjoying myself, until one of Chris’ solo songs came on. It was When I’m Down, recorded live at the Troubadour, and just Chris and a piano. I just sat there and listened and lost it. It must have been quite the sight, me sitting on the floor surrounded by garbage, sobbing. I cried for Chris, for his kids, all the people who must have loved him. I cried for my family and most of all I cried for me. It was after that that this idea came to me, that I would do something.

Since starting this painting I’ve begun sketching again, for myself. (Sadly most of the art I have been doing the past few years has all been school related). It’s like the floodgates have been opened. I’ve got ideas for half a dozen paintings now. I’ve also been listening to music I enjoy, not just the the Pop music my daughter wants. I’ve even gone looking for new music. Needless to say this painting has brought on a healing process for me. Thank you Chris.